The Purple Fig is an online women’s blogazine with an emphasis on realistic and inspiring personal stories from women of all age groups, lifestyles, and nationalities. We feature essays about parenting, the journey to womanhood, feminism, overcoming challenges in both career and personal life, and issues surrounding sexuality, relationships, and family life. As well, we have guest posts on beauty, fashion, home and design.
The idea of The Purple Fig is to create a community for women to share stories and relate without the filters of ego and self-consciousness. By doing this together we can produce a more authentic portrayal of the journey of a woman.
For me, one of the most poetic expressions of a female experience was by Sylvia Plath in The Bell Jar. In her own life Plath struggled to attain balance between being a mother, a woman, a poet/artist, and in the early sixties it was an even bigger challenge for a woman to do so. Ultimately, she couldn’t cope, so she stuck her head in an oven at the age of thirty while her two small children were in the other room. But within the pages of this fictional account of a young girl’s demise into insanity, we see Plath’s desperation to connect, to relate to something that makes her feel a little less alone in her experience. She, like many of us, wanted to be versatile, possess intricate layers of identities, but instead felt stuffed into one tiny box. The following passage is what inspired the name of this passion-fueled project: The Purple Fig.
I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig tree in the story. From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked. One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor, and another fig was Ee Gee, the amazing editor, and another fig was Europe and Africa and South America, and another fig was Constantine and Socrates and Attila and a pack of other lovers with queer names and offbeat professions, and another fig was an Olympic lady crew champion and beyond and above these figs were many more figs I couldn’t quite make out.
I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death because I couldn’t make up my mind which of the figs I would choose. I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and, one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet.
She then writes on the next page: It occurred to me that my vision of the fig tree and all the fat figs that withered and fell to earth might well have risen from the profound void of an empty stomach. Any woman can agree that being hungry and thinking too much can lead to madness
But alas, it was exactly what I was looking for and the idea of a fig tree with millions of figs representing the many sides of a woman was perfect! Of course, in her madness, Plath thought if we chose one fig the others would die, but we all know that it doesn’t have to be this way. What I want to explore with these stories/articles is being as many of these figs as possible at any point in our journey. It is easier said than done, I know this from personal experience, but it’s the journey towards being ‘one thing without the other parts dying’ that excites me. Nobody wants to be stuffed into one label. Certainly not this lady.
I wanted to create this particular avenue of connection by publishing stories online from real women, not acclaimed writers with a bunch of fancy metaphors and resumes a mile long. We are looking for well-written, honest pieces that pertain to the journey of a woman. Submit your story/essay pitch, blog idea, anything that you think would fit with The Purple Fig vibe. Please see the submissions page.
The journey of a woman is not simple, but there are plenty of uncomplicated pleasures along the way. We not only honor being truthful about the challenges and struggles, we also celebrate the beauty of having a hobby, encouraging our talents and pouring passion into to our every day life. It’s all here.
Thank you so much for visiting The Purple Fig.
I have always gravitated towards strong, independent, intelligent, mouthy ladies. These are women with something to say. It doesn’t always have to be deep and emotional, but usually there is humour and always meaning. They don’t take themselves too seriously. They don’t let men tell them what to do. Some of them are more reserved, a bit quieter, unassuming. None of them stand in the middle of a room with a megaphone and speak their mind just for the sake of hearing their own voice. And they aren’t afraid to ask the tough questions: Am I making a mistake? And say, I need help. They tell their stories the way they happened in reality—they talk about the part of them they don’t like very much. It’s not easy to do, but they do it because they are genuine.
Not all women are so able to freely express their inner most struggles however. Caitlin Moran writes in “How To Be A Woman”:
Yes, an old-fashioned feminist “consciousness-raising” still has enormous value. When the subject turns to abortion, cosmetic intervention, birth, motherhood, sex, love, work, misogyny, fear, or just how you feel in your own skin, women still won’t often tell the truth to each other unless they are very, very drunk. Perhaps the endlessly reported rise in female binge drinking is simply modern women’s attempt to communicate with each other.
Now, you may not agree with Moran, because you and your friends talk about anything and everything, as do mine. But, she is right in that in general women do struggle telling the truth about their experience. I discovered this when I became a mother. I felt very isolated at first because every other mom I met seemed to have it all together. Breastfeeding worked perfectly; the sleeplessness wasn’t a problem; the delivery wasn’t that bad without an epidural. It went on and on, and my inside voice just screamed behind my tongue during these conversations, “are you serious?! I got an epidural! Breastfeeding is not amazing for me. My baby irritates me sometimes!” I was actually lonely in my new community of women. It was a totally new experience for me to be blocking words with my tongue. I wondered if they were being genuine, and I do believe some of them were. But, I also had to think that some of these women weren’t using their inside voices. Perhaps they were using their ‘I’m rocking this’ voice.
Was this how all mothers felt? I wondered. Of course not. I knew this from my sister, books and new mom friends, who expressed some of the same struggles. Eventually, when I got to hear more about other experiences that were similar to mine, I felt better and less stressed. I couldn’t believe what an incredible gift it is to have women in my life who tell it like it really is. I had been taking it for granted for so many years, because before becoming a mother, it was all I’d known.
All I want with this online project is for us ladies to use our real voices. Thanks so much for visiting this site! I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it.